Do you know what really cheeses me off? ("Oh no, here we go again") HMMMMMMMMMMMM? Well, it is how the NORTHERN HEMISPHERE ("OOh we're so good, we're the northern hemisphere!") put themselves AT THE TOP of every and any map of the world!
THIS IS HEMISPHEREISM!

Take a little look, children, at space. Is there any top? Is there any bottom? Indeed, can anyone tell me where there are little signs pointing the way, bobbing around on a buoy, in that great vacuum?

Consequently, Australia is constantly being called "Down Under" usually by hoighty toighty, high and mighty Northern Hemisphereans. And don't they feel just so smug and superior while they are saying it! "NO" I declare, "Actually, we are Up Over". But this is usually ABOVE their comprehension and the poor, simple dears merely give me a quizzical look. Can't blame them really, I suppose. They have been brainwashed all these years, every night during the weather report, and all through their school career by evil, plotting teachers of the Northern Agenda.

But maybe we in the "Great Southern Land" are not even the alternative Top of the World (for those of a free mind.) The Equator may just as well be the top and the bottom at the same time!! THERE'S NO WAY OF KNOWING AND IT IS ALL OBVIOUSLY ABITRARY. But who, dear readers, is there to question this besides me? Who has the courage? If we could but start a movement for latitiude and longitudinal emancipation WE JUST MIGHT BRING ABOUT WORLD PEACE!

Think about it. What would the East do, if they suddenly found out that they may really be the west? Rewrite a whole lot of propaganda, that's what! And who would be skipping borders if Northern America instantly became South America????? See what I mean? Plus we would have the added bonus of the abolition of team sports (those odious mens' games) since no one would know which region they belonged to anymore!

Ah. Utopia.

I hope you see now how structured and institutionalized our thinking is on a world-wide scale. While you are on the top, you never question anything. It's like being blonde. It is left to the UNDERdogs- the avante garde and iconoclasts of geography - that the fate of the world depends on if it is to be liberated from the Hemisphereans' constraints!

So, burn those atlases! Smash those pre-conceived compasses! Rip that weather vane off your roof and trample it under foot! Or over foot! Let a new age begin.(Trumpets..)

And let the birds fly unfettered in the winter!