This is quite disturbing but, dear readers, I AM HEARING VOICES !!!!!!!!

And they are saying " I am cake .... I am lovely ... I am cake".

You know that old saying, 'insanity is hereditary - you get it from your kids' ? Well, I am blaming INSTANT JIM because he is a teacher, and he brings home the left over cake from the staff room and so it is he who is responsible for my madness my madness my mad ne ss s. Oh no, I'm twitching again!

He teaches at a boarding school (very la-di-da) and so the kitchen sends up to the staffroom what they have cooked for the kids that day for morning tea. Yes, I know, it is kind of gross to think of consuming foodstuff that has been kicking around a staff room for half a day, sneezed on, coughed on, picked at by the sadistic fingers that we know teachers have. BUT IT'S CAKE!!!!!!!!!!! Enough said.

But it doesn't stop there! He also " come to me .... come to me ... I am in the fridge .... i am lovely ..." brings home the left over cake from class parties at the end of the year, and birthday cakes as well!!!!!!! Oh, and I forgot the fancy caterers' cakes that they feed the teachers when they have to go to some professional development thing and are sweetened up because they don't get paid over-time ... yummy!

" ... am cake ..." The best cake he ever brought home, was this little Chinese boy's birthday cake that his mum had got especially made for the class. Well, I suppose
she had because it was huge - ALL THE MORE FOR US ! It was a chocolate mud cake with little blue icing pigs all over the top. Now, that cake really spoke to me! ".. LOVELY ...."

Look, I'm sorry - but I have to go now, must dash.

I AM COMING, MY DARLING ... I AM COMING!!!! ...