anonymous jones

Dedicated to the nicheless and the nameless ... fringe-dwellers of the madding crowd (does that sound pretentious enough?..)

Thursday, September 27, 2007



Oh gag.
I saw them putting up all the Xmas junk in Kmart this morning.
* Napoleon Dynamite sigh sound-effect.
Oh great. Oh hurrah. Oh woopy-do. Oh gag, again.

You know what this means, don't you? This means that all the Xmas nazis will be out in full force.

OH, WOE BETIDE YOU IF YOU CHOOSE NOT TO DO XMAS LIKE THE MASSES!
















A Japanese Xmas card.
(Yep, I thought that, too.. )

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I am always amazed at how the freshly cranked up 'peace and goodwill' suddenly stops at your feet if you have opted out of Xmas. Jesus never did Xmas. In fact, Jesus never asked anyone to do it - it was all invented hundreds and hundreds of years later by the Catholics, adapted from a pagan festival that was changed around. Actually, if you want to remember Jesus, then what about doing the Lord's supper which, after all, is how the Bible says Jesus asked to be remembered?( "Do this in remembrance of Me." )
Oh, but that would require going to church each week, which is not as easy as an annual pig-out plus prezzies. Hmm. Does God deal in once-a-year religious fixes??
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Yes, I'm a bit irked. It's such a hideous industry and nothing to do with what the person it pretends to honour wanted at all. YEAH, I KNOW SOME OF YOU WILL DISAGREE AND I've heard all the warm fuzzy usual blah blah "the spirit of Xmas" arguments. It's like a mass brain washing. But I like accuracy. I like things to be authentic. I can't stand fake.



The bad taste Beckhams at it again.







So I won't have anything to do with it.

Am I going to tell you what to do? No. But just have a think. And if you decide to free yourself then know that there is a huge subculture of different people doing the very same. Some of them nominate New Year's Day as a gift-giving time (which kids love just as much) and some of them join in with Festivus (for the rest of us) a la Seinfeld. Some just go au naturale and do nothing!





I applaud the Christians who have taken Christ out of Xmas!

This is probably not going to be a popular post, dear readers, is it?

Too radical. Too scary. Too socially unacceptable.

Thursday, September 13, 2007










BAA BAA RAINBOW SHEEP IS THE DIZZY LIMIT!!!

I want to know what you think.

And to get you all, dear readers, into a real lather of politically correct outrage here are a few of my favourites:








I'm a size challenged teapot, small in stature and generous of girth,
Here is my handle and here is my non-pressurised, safety device-enabled, spout. When I get all steamed up then
hear me shout in an elevated decibel, yet non-threatening verbal tone,
"Tip me over and release my non-caffeinated, dairy free organic contents. "
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Vertically challenged Jack Horner sat in the socially accepted timeout space eating his highly nutritious, low fat, gluten free snack. He stuck in his thumb and pulled out a nut-free plum and said, " This is good for my self esteem".
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Mary had a dimensionally-challenged-but-no-less-useful-to-society lamb,
It's fleece was as rainbow as snow,
And everywhere that Mary went,
The lamb chose to follow, out of its own free will not because it felt compelled to by the mores of a patriarchal phallus-centred society that seeks dominance over non-human life forms.






Oh dear.




It all really began with golliwogs, didn't it?








First it was the golliwogs.
Then it was giving fruit and veges to poor Cookie Monster and making him sing that healthy fooooods taste so gooood song instead of C is for cookie (that's good enough for me).

After that, well what else could we call it but Tinkywinkyphobia and all because of his handbag and purple fur!







I've even heard rumblings about the Oompa Loompas. Disgraceful.





And finally it has now come to Baa Baa Rainbow Sheep being sung in our local kindergartens. This particular aberration began in Britain.





WHERE WILL IT END????!!!!!!












Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Why do Americans often give their religion and political allegiance in the same sentence/in the same breath? I've read this so often while blog-hopping in the profiles.
"I am a Christian and a Republican"
"I am a democrat and a Christian"
"I am a Muslim and Impeach Bush Now!"
"I am a Menschevik Mormon".
Well, maybe not the latter. It's very very odd.. There are a lot of gung-ho Baptists and Jews and Catholics and what-nots out there with banners and rosettes and rally marches and party lines. Very weird.

How can you be that devoted to a political persuasion? I understand religious devotion, of course, and the approval of God. But is there a teaching circulating that God backs a political party in particular? Surely no-one thinks George Bush and his party are divinely inspired? I don't get it.

I don't see the British doing this. (But religion isn't big in Britain really, strangely enough.)
Do the Canadians do this?
Do the Europeans?
Does Asia?
I haven't noticed it. But I have noticed the Middle Eastern countries do it.

That's a bit disturbing.

And no, Australia is not like this at all, not that I'm particularly politically savvy( voting on the basis of who has the best eyebrows and would make the best caricature for cartoonists) but I think most Australians are pretty flexible on who they will vote for.

The Westminster system really is the most democratic in the world. You know, I reckon the Yanks'll have a real dictator one day because their system overly exalts the president. Just catch the Messianic overtones to some of their campaigns: scary!


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