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Is anyone else dreading the Olympics? . I am.
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Did you know that China is a "peace-loving nation" ? Apparently they are because a trucked-in by China, anti-protestor protestor with a I heart China banner proclaimed it so before she lost her voice and burst a blood vessel. (This type of stuff was at the torch relay in Australia where reportedly the torch came and went, though nobody saw it because of the para-military Chinese goons in their light blue trackies who got in the way.) Giving the Olympics to China is like taking it off Ancient Greece and giving it to Imperial Rome.


The Olympics is a nauseating display of everything nauseating. Think of the money nations waste on it, and for what? A few feel good moments on the telly and some medals that individuals take home and hope don't get nicked and sold off on Ebay!


Nowadays, sport is the opiate of the masses. Give them bread and circuses.





I guess the level of how sickening it is depends on what level your country is insane about sport. For Australia that is about Level 1. Perhaps, though, there are little kingdoms or republics or principalities somewhere that go in for the Eurovision Song Contest more than they do the Olympics. Places where they eat sheep cheese etc. Places where a mankini is a good look. I'd like to see the 500m swimming relay done in mankinis.




On second thoughts, maybe I wouldn't.



Oh boy, and I bet they will shove the ol' "Spirit of the Olympics" thing down our throats as well. I'm sick of that "Spirit of ... (insert subject)" device that gets trotted out for pretty well you name it. The Spirit of the Olympics, the Xmas Spirit, the ANZAC Spirit, the Australian Spirit, the AFL Spirit, School Spirit; yeah, that's the spirit. Not.

Fake.

That's why I don't like it. It's the money-cranking, euphoria-manufacturing, national grand-standing, funds-guzzling, Disney-smiling fakeness of it all.

I wonder if the Tibetan monks who are still alive will watch it?

I guess it's compulsory viewing in China.

My recently acquired acquisition, a female Irish Setter, I have discovered is a floozy. She is also a scarlet woman because she is a red setter. She's the sort of dog who, if she was human, would wear micro bikinis to the beach, mini-skirts on public transport, and wet T-shirts everywhere else. (The last being because she'd enhance everything worth enhancing with surgery if she could.) I said she was a dog; actually, she's a bitch. I'm sure she'd like a designer chihuahua.

The other night I caught her lying on top of InstantJim on the couch - licking him! InstantJim the confirmed Dog-Hater! InstantJim the Cat Person! And she just looked up at me with her brown boudoir eyes and sent me a telepathic message: "Nyair nyair!" I sent her one back: "I'll get you - home-wrecker!" and I did, too, by eating that cold organic chicken sausage in the fridge myself!

But animals are like that, aren't they? Free-loading parasites who get fed better than your own children and end up having the best chair in the house. But what do they do to deserve any of this? Puppy dog eyes? It's not like they can look at you with iguana eyes, is it, so I don't count that. Same goes for the cute factor - unless they rehearse a series of tricks and perform them in front of you just to have a tummy-rub with a steel capped boot or a crumb of your tofu sandwich (in which case that would be sort of worthy). But mine are usually sleeping, eating, pooing or waiting around the front door to come inside and supplant me. Sponge dogs.

Well, floozy girl had better watch herself. She's messing with a being of Superior Intellect here! A being with an Opposable Thumb! She may look like she's related to orangutans but I have far more in common with them! Oh, .. er ... you know what I mean.

Cunningly, I will use my opposable thumb and, with a fine pincer motion guided by my enormous brain, I will turn on the West Coast Eagles versus the Dockers match on the telly! She can't compete with that. Even in a wet Tshirt.